Friday Funday

Human Resources Heaven and Hell

One day, while walking down the street, a highly successful HR Director was tragically hit by a bus and she had died just moments later. Her soul arrived up in heaven where she was met at the Pearly Gates by St. Peter himself.

"Welcome to Heaven," said St. Peter. "Before you get settled in though, it seems we have a bit of a problem. You see, strangely enough, we've never once had a Human Resources Director make it this far and we aren't really sure what we need to do with you."

"No problem, just let me in." said the woman.

"Well, I'd like to," replied St. Peter, "but I have higher orders. What we're going to do is let you have a day in Hell and a day in Heaven. Once you've done this, then you can choose whichever one you would want to spend an eternity in."

"Actually, I think I've made up my mind where I want to be, and I prefer to stay in Heaven." said the woman.

"Sorry, we have rules..." said St. Peter.

And with that St. Peter put the executive in an elevator and it down-down-down into the depths of Hell. The doors of the elevator opened and she found herself stepping out onto the putting green of a beautiful golf course. In the distance was the club house, to one side were various types of lush tropical trees and shrubbery, to the other was the ocean with the calming sounds and smells of the spray as it crashed against the coast and standing in front of her were all her friends - fellow executives that she had worked with and they were all dressed in evening gowns and suits and they were all cheering for her. They ran up to her and embraced her and kissed her on both cheeks and they talked about old times they have had. They then played a excellent round of golf, and at night went to the club house where they all enjoyed a dinner of steak and lobster. Later on in the night, she actually had the chance to meet Lucifer himself, who was actually a decent guy (kind of cute) and she had a great time telling jokes and dancing. She was having such a wonderful time, that before she knew it, the 24-hour period she had was up. Everyone shook her hand and hugged her and waved goodbye as she got back onto the elevator. The elevator ascended and opened back up at the Pearly Gates and she found St. Peter standing before her, awaiting her arrival again.

"Now it's time to spend a day in heaven." he said. So she spent the next 24 hours lounging around on the clouds and playing various types of orchestral instruments and singing angelically to the most beautiful songs that you could possibly think of. She was having the greatest of times, and before she knew it, her 24 hours in heaven had ran out and St. Peter came and got her.

"So, you have spent a day in hell and you have spend a day in heaven. Now, you must choose your eternity. What will it be?" said St. Peter.

The woman paused for a moment to mull over her options and her experiences she had in the last 48 hours. After doing so, she replied, "Well, I never thought I'd say this, I mean, Heaven has been really, really great and all, but I think I had a better time in Hell."

So, after hearing this response, St. Peter escorted her back to the elevator and again she descended back to Hell.

When the door of the elevator opened again, she found herself standing in a desolate wasteland covered in garbage and filth, resembling the likeness of a post-apocalyptic world. She then saw her friends, dressed in rags and where picking up garbage and putting it into sacks. A far cry from what she had remembered just a day ago. The Devil came up to her and put his arm around her shoulders.

"I don't understand," the woman stammered, "yesterday, I was here and there was a golf course and a club house and we had lobster and steak, danced and had a great time. Now all there is, is nothing. Everything has been laid to waste and all of my friends look absolutely horrid and miserable."

The Devil looked at her and smiled egregiously and responded, "Of course, yesterday we were recruiting you, today you're staff..."